Editorial Review

By the author of the modern classic The Black Swan, this collection of aphorisms and meditations expresses his major ideas in ways you least expect.

The Bed of Procrustes takes its title from Greek mythology: the story of a man who made his visitors fit his bed to perfection by either stretching them or cutting their limbs. It represents Taleb’s view of modern civilization’s hubristic side effects—modifying humans to satisfy technology, blaming reality for not fitting economic models, inventing diseases to sell drugs, defining intelligence as what can be tested in a classroom, and convincing people that employment is not slavery.

Playful and irreverent, these aphorisms will surprise you by exposing self-delusions you have been living with but never recognized.

With a rare combination of pointed wit and potent wisdom, Taleb plows through human illusions, contrasting the classical values of courage, elegance, and erudition against the modern diseases of nerdiness, philistinism, and phoniness. ... Read more

Reviews

What's the rush? Slow down and think .....

An intriguing book based on an interesting thesis, well presented, in saying "we humans, facing limits of knowledge, and things we do not observe, the unseen and the unknown, resolve the tension by squeezing life and the world into crisp commoditized ideas ..."

"The person you are most afraid to contradict is yourself," Taleb begins, and shortly after continues, "to bankrupt a fool, give him information."

Okay, I declare bankruptcy. These aphorisms are an eloquent Luddite protest against the madcap technological excesses and follies of the modern world. I agree. Every new technology blossoms into excess, then retreats into practical use as newer ideas develop. Obsidian was once a new idea in cutting; but, anything this good soon evolved into ornaments and other impractical uses.

It's the inevitable fate of all new technology and all new ideas. All good ideas become complicated into absurdity, until wiser people ask, "Just what are we trying to accomplish here?"

Taleb is a wise man asking such questions, and this book is one of questions and relevant observations. It's the same question anyone with a cell phone and the choice of 250,000 apps might ask, like Taleb, "Why?" and the answer is "I dunno."

In brief, this is an eloquent plea to slow down and think.

What's missing is a recognition of human curiosity which creates all technology, from obsidian blades to Blackberrys. It's a book devoid of curiosity, of Rudyard Kipling's Five Faithful Serving Men and the journalist's eternal questions, "Who? What? Why? When? How?"

Of course, I'm not aware of the Luddites having many answers. But, Taleb, like those who sit and refuse to budge do serve to remind the rest of us that scurrying about accomplishes little. More power to him, and to those who ask, "Is this trip necessary?"

Now it is proven that you don't need to be dead to have people enjoy your aphorisms
I love this book. If you are a thinking businessman or academic, I think you will like it. The style is harsh, masculine, thoughtful, to the point, non-religious and timeless. The style reminds me a bit of Livingstone (Too Soon Old, Too Late Smart: Thirty True Things You Need to Know Now and Never Stop Dancing) even though he writes prose. The title of the book alludes to Greek mythology, but you don't need to know who Zeus was to enjoy the book. However, some people dislike the style of both Taleb and Livingstone, so the book is not for everyone. Finally, since the book is published this year (2010), you can utter some of the aphorisms out loud, causing the belief that you are a witty person :)

Potently distilled Taleb
I'm among those people who will read pretty much anything Nassim Nicholas Taleb writes, so I preordered this book without needing to know anything about its specifics. I just finished my first pass and am not disappointed (and will need to read the book again, probably many times).

We shouldn't make the mistake of getting so impressed that we're in danger of worshipping Taleb, and indeed some of his points may be exaggerated, inconsistent, partially wrong, or even completely wrong (I think he might even agree with that), but he's also genuinely and uniquely brilliant, and my sense is that he's right about most things and thus a source of valuable real-world insights.

Others have suggested that one shouldn't try to summarize Taleb, but we can surely say that his work revolves around the realization that we humans, both individually and collectively, are unknowingly prone to many kinds of errors and biases, so we need to develop practical tools to help compensate and especially to avoid disastrous consequences.

Using its densely aphoristic format, the book richly and wittily fleshes out this general idea by providing more specific insights on a wide array of "philosophical and practical" topics spanning much of the human condition. And I'll add that while Taleb seems ambivalent about Wittgenstein, I think his ideas are closer to those of the later Wittgenstein than he may realize (which I intend to be a compliment, while agreeing that Wittgenstein can sometimes be rather opaque).

If you're willing to take a serious look at yourself and the social world in which you're embedded, at risk of undermining some cherished illusions, this is a book not to be missed. Others have made many of the same points as Taleb but, to my knowledge, no one else writing today has done so with the same level of broad erudition and artistically powerful flair (hence his outlier level of readership and influence).

Excellent Book!
If you've read Nassim Nicholas Taleb's other books ("Fooled By Randomness" and "The Black Swan") then you have an idea of the power and magnificence contained in his writing. In my humble opinion, "The Bed of Procrustes: Philosophical and Practical Aphorisms" is excellent; it's a must read. I have been anticipating this book's release for quite some time. Several months ago Taleb was testing out many of these aphorisms on Twitter, so it's interesting to see how the book came together. I certainly enjoy witty aphorisms and this book contains some of the best I've ever read.

"My best definition of a nerd: someone who asks you to explain an aphorism."

As Taleb says, aphorisms lose their charm whenever explained so I'll refrain from demonstrating my foolishness and ignorance by trying to interpret any of them in this forum.

Excellent-Nassim Nicholas Taleb at his best
My copy arrived today, and I was anxious to read Taleb's book of aphorisms after following his progress at his website. He does not disappoint; he will make many laugh, many angry, and most think. His wit and insight spares no one; particularly academics, economists, and bankers (politicians, too).

The chapter I most anticipated was Robustness and Fragility, given Taleb's continuing dialogue at Facebook concerning anti-fragility.

This slim volume is highly recommended if you enjoyed Fooled By Randomness and The Black Swan. Highest recommendation.

Sam Kinison of contemporary philosophy
Taleb is the Sam Kinison of contemporary philosophy: He shrieks mischievously about how we delude ourselves and allow others (e.g., consultants and intellectuals) to delude us. "The Bed of Procrutes" tells where not to look for answers and seems grounded in a profound respect for the ever-elusive: human dignity and courage. Unlike his seminal "The Black Swan," which overflowed with examples and explanations (and which should have been proofread more carefully) this book is spare and copy-edited. It is compulsory reading for the aspiring fl�neur.

Great encouragement to think more!
I'm a big Taleb fan, but this review is not biased. I enjoyed this book a lot. It's a quick read, but is intended to make the reader think. Highly recommend it. ... Read more

Editorial Review

Reviews

Big Disappointment, November 5, 2010
I was expecting a "memoir", as it was presented in the show. To get 150+ pages of one liners straight from the script was a huge disappointment.

Disappointed but amused, November 12, 2010
As another reviewer already mentioned, it is a compilation of lines from the actual show. It actually amused me, though, because ala Mad Men, it is a brilliant marketing scheme. Publish a book with content already created and paid for. It's like getting paid for the same material TWICE! Awesome! But, as far a a read, not so much. It will make a nice little addition to die hard Mad Men fans collection, but if you are expecting any kind of biography of Roger Sterling, you are out of luck. Too bad, because that would have made a great book. Then again, someone would have actually had to WRITE that. Touche Man Men, touche!

Book of one-liners, November 30, 2010
Thought this book would have more than just one, short sentence per page. Yes, some of the one-liners are humorous. However, I was expecting some short quips or stories that correlate to the serious arc.

Sterling ain't gold, December 19, 2010
I was disappointed with the Sterling's Gold book. One saying per page, lots of cheesy drawings, not that much fun. Not a good value, even for a huge fan. Maybe I can get my money back by selling it 20 years from now at a garage sale.

Short, Fun, and the Perfect Gift for Any Mad Men Fan, November 9, 2010
I was thrilled to get Sterling's Gold: Wit and Wisdom of an Ad Man because like many TV viewers, I'm a big fan of Mad Men. I wasn't sure what "story" Roger Sterling was really going to tell. On the show, we hear him making notes into a recorder about his life, but it's really Sterling's great one-liners that endear him to us. He's got the best lines, and always delivered at just the right time.

Well imagine getting those lines back-to-back? It would make you feel as if Sterling was in the room, smoking away and making you giggle, take pause, and shake your head at the incorrigible-ness he projects. We love Roger because he says the things we didn't think to say, at a time when we would never dream of saying it out loud.

One thing I appreciated about this book is that in delivering Sterling's story this way (rather than a straight autobiography) was that it gives you Sterling's essence much more completely than a longer, more traditional book. Kudos to the writers!

This book is filled with great one liners like "The day you sign a client is the day you start losing him," "Being with a client is like being in a marriage. Sometimes you get into it for the wrong reasons, and eventually they hit you in the face," and "When God closes a door, he opens a dress." The book is divided into sections on business, marriage, life, his coworkers, and more. It has pictures from the show at the start of each section, which make it that much more of a fabulous gift for Mad Men fans. The book is short and will take you no more than fifteen minutes to read. And guess what? You will enjoy every single minute.

Hilarious!, December 8, 2010
This small hard covered book is divided into various categories, with a selection of Roger's best 'one liners'. He's written an introduction (as Roger Stirling), however I would have liked to have read more from him in this dialogue. The one liners however, are exceptional. Now that I have the shows on Blue Ray, I'm rediscovering these quotes throughout the series, which is quite hilarious! ... Read more

Editorial Review

Behind the humor of these pieces, readers will see Twain's serious thoughts on the relationship between God and Man, biblical inconsistencies, Darwinism, science, and the impact of technology on religious beliefs. "A fascinating panoply of wit, satire, farce, fantasy, lyricism, heresy, the sardonic, and the controversial."--Patricia Hassler, Booklist. ... Read more

Reviews

Generally, a good collection, December 24, 1999
In the decades since his death, many of Mark Twain's writings have been reorganized into common themes such as protests, speeches, short stories and sketches, and full works of fiction in larger volumes. A recent welcome addition to these is The Bible According to Mark Twain, which includes diaries of Adam, Eve, and other Old Testament characters, various speculations on what the imaginary Heaven might be like (including Captain Stormfield's), some autobiographical dictations, a few pieces that appear in print for the first time, and, of course, Letters From the Earth.

It also contains too many of the editor's notes that plague most of Twain's posthumous releases. Here, notes take up 50 of the book's first 260 pages (10 more are blank). Why do editors feel compelled to insert their version of Twain's autobiography before every entry? If they must share this information with readers, they can do so at the start or the end of the book, without interrupting Twain's far superior writing. Granted, some of the details are worth knowing: Twain read Paine's Age of Reason while piloting riverboats. This helped shape his views toward Christianity. But other statements are extremely irritating: "...we have omitted the five-and-a-half page attack on the concept of the virgin birth (mistakenly referred to as the immaculate conception) because that discussion is not closely related to the writings in this volume." Yes it is! Claims like this make me wonder what else is missing. The rest of Twain's writings on religion need a book of their own, WITHOUT the gratuitous editorial comments.

I'll let Twain have the last word:

"From the beginning of time, whenever a king has lain dangerously ill, the priesthood and some part of the nation have prayed in unison that the king be spared to his grieving and anxious people (in case they were grieving and anxious, which was not usually the rule) and in no instance was their prayer ever answered. When Mr. Garfield lay near to death, the physicians and surgeons knew that nothing could save him, yet at an appointed signal all the pulpits in the United States broke forth with one simultaneous and supplicating appeal for the President's restoration to health. They did this with the same old innocent confidence with which the primeval savage had prayed to his imaginary devils to spare his perishing chief -- for that day will never come when facts and experience can teach a pulpit anything useful. Of course the President died, just the same."

Indispensable religious satire, October 4, 2002
Mark Twain promptly proves with this volume that he is, indeed, as the title states, "America's Master Satirist." Having grown up in a fundamentalist Presbyterian community, Twain knew his Bible well; and, like any thinking person, his beliefs and attitudes relating to it changed as he grew older, wiser, and more experienced. Although Twain - due to many factors, such as the death of several children and his wife and his failed investments - grew famously bitter towards the end of his life, his vision remained remarkably clear-headed, though clearly suffued with pessimism - indeed, his zest for the truth and absolute intolerance for mankind's accepted irrational beliefs became even more razor-sharp during this period. Although there are writings in this volume from all phases of Mark Twain's career, the majority of them do come from that latter period - a period in which, indeed, the exploration of these themes was the main facet of his writing. Included are such well-known items as the Diaries of Adam and Eve (as well as several other Old Testament characters), Captain Stormfield's Visit To Heaven (published here in full for the first time ever), and, of course, his masterpiece, Letters From The Earth. In these, and the other, oftentimes more obscure pieces, Twain burlesques and satarizes freely, calling mankind on both his steadfast taking to irrational and illogical beliefs, as well as on his sheer stupidity and gullibility. If one is looking for a satire along the lines of Tom Sawyer or Huck Finn, then this is DEFINITELY not the place to look; however, if you have a fondness, as I do, for the darker, more probing side of Twain, then this is a volume that you must most definitely pick up.

Who says it's not possible to be funny when you're angry?, April 27, 1998
The Bible According to Mark Twain gathers together a group of writings by the famous author that were either published years ago or not at all. The writings all deal with Mark Twain's intense study and understanding of the Bible. The book begins with some humorous ideas of what Adam's and Eve's diaries may have looked like during their first days together and then later after their expulsion from the Garden of Eden. Twain is unable to comprehend how they could be punished for doing something bad (eating the fruit from the tree of knowledge) when they still had no conception of good and bad until they ate the apple. Later works detail some thoughts on Noah and the flood and the importance of flies. It was important to preserve the disease carriers. When Twain takes a walk through Heaven you discover halos, harps, and wings are just for show. And finally he finishes up with a scathing attack on the stupidity of mankind, pointing out that statements like, Thou Shall Not Kill, and committing genocide do not go together. Or how could man conceive of a Heaven as Heaven and leave out sexual intercourse? If sanity is dangerous to your health, don't read this book.

Mark Twain's Take on Bible Stories, November 28, 2005

In this book Mark Twain aims his satire at favorite stories from the Old Testament. He worked on these essays for most of his life but was afraid their irreverent nature would damage his career, therefore, he just kept re-writing and re-editing them. Most of them were not published until after his death and for some this is their introduction.

Adam and Eve, in their diaries, present bittersweet divergent stories of their dysfunctional relationship. Their accounts could be prototypes from a marriage counsellor's office, or short versions of "Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus."

Captain Stormfield has a dream about ending up in Heaven when he thought he was going to the other place. "He was deeply religious, by nature and by the training of his mother, and a fluent swearer by the training of his father." In this original and inventive story, we learn all those things about heaven that were left out of the Bible - but would be included in an imaginary book, "How to experience Heaven in six weeks on $10 a day."

An "Etiquette in the Afterlife" excerpt: "Do not try to show off. St. Peter dislikes it. The simpler you are dressed, the better it will please him. Above all things, avoid overdressing. A pair of spurs and a fig-leaf is plenty...leave your dog outside. Heaven goes by favor. If it went by merit, you would stay outside and the dog would go in."

In the masterpiece, "Letters From The Earth," Satan has been temporarily expelled from heaven and is wandering around the universe. On a lark, he decides to visit earth, an outlying little spot in an outlying galaxy that God had once played around with for a few days. Satan is astounded at what he finds, and writes home:

"This is a strange place, an extraordinary place, and interesting. There is nothing resembling it at home. The people are all insane, the other animals are all insane, the Earth is insane. Man is a marvelous curiosity. When he is at his best he is a sort of low grade nickel-plated angel; at his worst he is unspeakable, unimaginable; and first and last and all the time he is a sarcasm. Yet he blandly and in all sincerity calls himself the 'noblest work of God'...if I may put another strain on you - he thinks he is the Creator's pet. He believes the Creator's proud of him; sits up nights to admire him; yes, and watch over him and keep him out of trouble. He prays to Him, and thinks He listens. Isn't it a quaint idea? Fills his prayers with crude and bald and florid flatteries of Him, and thinks He sits and purrs over these extravagancies and enjoys them. He prays for help, and favor, and protection, every day; and does it with hopefulness and confidence, too, although no prayer of his has ever been answered...he thinks he's going to heaven! He has salaried teachers who tell him that. They also tell him there is a hell, of everlasting fire, and that he will go there if he doesn't keep the Commandments."

Of course, Noah makes an entertaining appearance, and through it all, Mark Twain has an opportunity to expound about those things in the Old Testament that do not quite make sense to him.

The authors offer scholarly histories about these essays for those who are interested. When they finally let loose with the words of Mark Twain, the reader feels a breath of fresh air. This is a fine collection of satires on religion by perhaps America's premier homespun author; a very definite five stars, and well worth your time.

A heavenly work of devilish mischief, September 2, 2004
"The Bible According to Mark Twain" is one of those serendipitous finds that is as delightful as is it unexpected. Twain shows himself to be a serious thinker about biblical issues, especially as they pertain to the saintly rogues and roguish saints who populated his world. The works in this volume expand on biblical themes, and are as human as they are irreverent. There is no sacrilege or blasphemy intended in Twain's musings -- simply the toil of a man trying to come to terms with the sometimes illogical world inhabited by religious people.

Twain muses on the story of Noah's ark by wondering about the germs that must have been stowed aboard along with Noah and his family. What kind of a God would ensure that such dangerous organisms would survive the "destruction" of life on earth, allowing them to renew their deadly work afterward? Twain's Captain Stormfield, recently deceased and on his way to heaven, shows the author grappling with the recently-discovered enormity of the universe, and with a heaven segregated (not by race and religion as one Earth) by planet and geographical region. "Letters from Earth," authored by Satan before his banishment to eternal fire, makes rather pointed comments about earthlings' desire for a heaven that is both bereft of earthly pleasures (notably sex) and filled with activity that earthlings normally shun (singing, church services, rubbing shoulders with Jews, blacks and heathens).

Few if any of the completed and incomplete works in this volume were published in Twain's lifetime. Yet the writings show him to be a religious man, in the sense of one who wrestles with the great eternal questions. Twain could not have been satisfied with the pious niceties he likely received from the religious worthies of his day. His questions continue to challenge us to enlarge our conceptions of the deity. Not for him was a deity who looked too much like the rascals and fools he encountered on a day's perambulation. Many of his questions (for instance about the historicity of the Bible) were very perceptive and continue to challenge us to this day.

"The Bible According to Mark Twain" may not rock your religious world, but it will set you to thinking about the way that in every age, "God" acts and thinks suspiciously like ourselves!

Without any doubt this book belongs on everyone's bookshelf., February 7, 1996
Marvelous. Compelling. Funny. (How rare to review a new work by Mark Twain!) This book is rare, old scotch with just enough ice. It's a fine, black Connecticut cigar. It's a wide tie with a brave picture on it. It's a moonlit sail on the seas of time, and the distant rasping, drawling voice of God, winking at the human race through his prophet Samuel. Get it. Read it a little at a time. Hope like hell somebody finds some more papers out there in California that nobody has had the chance at, and that the small minded are at lunch and the office boy leaves them in the outbox and they, too, come to print while yet we live. No one can possibly get past the mythic Mark Twain to a deeper understanding of the great writer and his later passions without a thorough reading of the Eden stories, and an enjoyment of his darker humor. As an anthology, this book is a delight. But this work includes previously unpublished writings, and so it must be in any Twain lover's library. The author of this book is Clemens himself. The editors have, with appropriate reverence and irreverence, expanded the horizons of our understanding. Hoorays and war-whoops all round.

Surprisingly non-controversial, July 10, 2001
I am a very religious person, and I was somewhat skeptical about reading this book when I received it as a gift. My husband and I read each other the diaries of Adam and Eve, and by the end we were both so moved we cried. True, it is excellent satire, but it is hardly offensive. Mark Twain manages to weave in sincerity and bits of truth with his masterful parodies.

Not as great as the other works, November 9, 2005
I am a fan of Mark Twain and have read all of his major works: Huck Finn, Tom Sawyer, Connecticut Yankee, Prince and the Pauper, etc... and so I was excited to discover this book at my local library. After reading it I realized why it is not as well-known as the other works; it is not as entertaining, endearing, humorous, or heart-wrenching. In short, this book is a collection of several writings. These include Twain's writings on the Bible, and commentaries written by others on Twain's writings on the Bible. The former is not one continuous work, but actually several different works written to parallel different parts of the Bible, primarily the Old Testament. The most notable of these is the story that mocks Genesis. Told from both Adam's and Eve's point of view, it retells the Genesis story and the life of the first humans with a touch of wit, dry humor, sarcasm, and ribaldness. Though funny at times, and probably at the edge of decency when they were first published, the humor and points made in these stories are nothing significant in today's world. All in all an alright edition to the canon on Twain.

The quintessential Twain on religion., September 1, 2010
This book is a long needed source for the views that Mark Twain held on religion. It would be best though if you read his 'Letters From the Earth' book before reading this one. You will get the full dose of 'Twain' humor before you delve into his insights and background work for those stories. 'Letters From the Earth' was also published long after Twain's death, around 1962. This book contains a large amount of 'new' material from the Twain Project library at the Univ of Cal Berkeley, and really is a must have book. You will not be disappointed at all, surprised occasionally, but never disappointed.

The truth hurts, December 30, 2007
Its facinating how religious fanatics blindly believe every fairytale putforth in a fiction book written by early man with one hell of an imagination. Even when Mark Twain has ripped their world apart with deductive reasoning they will still hold on to their primitive beliefs with a vengence. Enuf of the soap box, I luv how this author gets deep into some of the Bibles fallicies and reveals it in a straight forward and sometimes comical manner. The story in paticular of God sending Moses to ravage the Midinaites slaughtering innocent men women and children even the livestock and houses and selling the young girls into prostitution has touched me deeply. Would I personally believe in a murderous vengefull God, Not unless I was brainwashed from early childhood and cud seriously overlook these atrocities and blindly believe everything I was force fed.
I wud reccomend this book to every one sitting on a fence wondering and thinking about things that dont make sense. I cant get off that soap box. ... Read more

Editorial Review

Invaluable ready reference, brimming with amusing and insightful quotes, includes hundreds of Twain’s most memorable quips and comments on life, love, history, culture, travel and diverse other topics, among them"He is now fast rising from affluence to poverty"; "Get your facts first, and then you can distort them as much as you please"; and "More than one cigar at a time is excessive smoking."
... Read more

Reviews

Great collection of clever quotes about all aspects of life., January 22, 2005
Samuel Langhorne Clemens, better known as Mark Twain, the author of such books as "The Adventures of Tom Sawyer" and "The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn" among others, was a highly intelligent and incredibly witty man. His keen observations of the world, and the often satirical commentary he made on it, are a delight to read, and this book pulls together some real gems from many of his books, speeches, and personal notebooks. There are some 358 quotations included, divided into categories as follows: (1) on men, women, children, and human nature, (2) on love, marriage, and romance, (3) on virtue, vice, and conduct, (4) on politics and history, (5) on religion, (6) on youth and aging, (7) on truth, honesty, lies, and illusion, (8) on reading, writing, and education, (9) on health and exercise, (10) on money and business, (11) on travel, and (12) on various other subjects. Each quote is attributed to its source for easy reference. This is a very slim and very affordable little volume, only fifty-five pages in length, and in fact my only criticism is that it doesn't include more material. But it is still well worth getting, and at this price it won't break any pocketbooks.

Here is a small selection of what you can expect:

"Clothes make the man. Naked people have little or no influence in society" (pg. 3).

"Familiarity breeds contempt -- and children" (pg. 7).

"It is better to deserve honors and not have them than to have them and not deserve them" (pg. 15).

"Suppose you were an idiot. And suppose you were a member of Congress. But I repeat myself" (pg. 23).

"Heaven for climate, Hell for company" (pg. 28).

"When I was a boy of fourteen, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be twenty-one, I was astonished at how much he had learned in seven years" (pg. 28).

A good little quote book, December 28, 2005
I have always been a fan of Mark Twain since I first read Huck Finn.

This is a great little book his quotations from his writings and speeches.

It's a nice little stocking stuffer as the book is small.

Some of my favorites:

"Classic." A book which people praise and don't read.

Honesty is the best policy--when there is money in it.

Some people like when they tell the truth. I tell the truth lying.

In God We Trust. I don't belive it would sound any better if it were true.

Suppose you were an idiot. And suppose you were a member of Congress. But I repeat myself.

Martyrdom covers a multitude of sins.

When we remember we are all mad, the mysteries of life disappear and life stands explained.

Cheer Up with Biting Humor of Mark Twain, November 5, 2004
Enjoy few quotes from this humorous book, then go and buy a copy:

ADVERTISING

During his days as a journalist, the young Mark Twain once edited a small newspaper in Missouri. A subscriber wrote in, saying that he had found a spider in his paper and asked whether this was a sign of good or bad uck. Twain answered:

"Dear Subscriber: Finding a spider in your paper was neither good luck nor bad luck for you. The spider was merely looking over our paper to see which merchant is not advertising so that he can go to that store, spin his web across the door and lead a life of undisturbed peace ever afterward."

ADVICE

It is beter to give than receive - especially advice. Mark Twain was always willing to donate free advice to the needy and the unsuspecting. "It's notble to be good", he said, "and it's nobler to teach others to be good, and less trouble."

Whenever you find that you are on the side of majority, it is time to reform (- or pause and reflect).

BELIEFS

If the man doesn't believe as we do, we say he is a crank, and that settles it. I mean, it does nowadays, because now we can't burn him.

SURGERY

Mark Twain offered this advice on the proper state of mind for undergoing surgery: "Console yourself with the reflection that you are giving the doctor pleasure, and that he is getting paid for it."

INSULTS

When Mark Twain disapproved of someone, he was not likely o keep it a secret. A remark he made on hearing of the death of an annoying person is typical:

"He has done a thing for me which I wouldn't even have done for myself. If he will only stay dead now I will call the account square and drop the grudge I bear him."

The Wit and Wisom of Mark Twain, September 8, 2001
A hilarious book of qoutes, sayings, and one-liners only Mark Twain could have the genious to create.

A qoute from Adam, the first of many: Adam was but human - this explains it all. He did not want the apple for the apple's sake, he wanted it only because it was forbidden. The mistake was in not forbidding the serpent; then he would have eaten the serpent.

From Adam, the wit and humor only becomes more hysterical, more riveting, more evident; and we soon discover the true intelligence of Mark Twain. He was not an ordinary man; for no mere ordinary man could have thought, and often dared, to utter such words as Mark Twain, in the era in which he lived.

The Wit and Wisdom of Mark Twain contains some of his most outrageous qoutes, either written within his books, or his journals, and spanning more than four decades. A great read, which you don't have to start at the beginning, and work your way to the end. And a perfect way to escape the drollery of prime time television.

Amusing and Timeless Reading, May 21, 2000
Mark Twain captures human nature at it's best and worst in this book. The collection of quotes by Twain "alphabetically" comment honestly on topics ranging from adultery to government to money to youth. Such insight into humanity rarely comes along in a lifetime (or several lifetimes!) His words in truly reflect society during his lifespan and, as I have reread this book several times, the passages reflect society today. This book is an "easy read" as it contains memorable quotes as well as portions of a variety of speeches, papers and books/stories Mr. Twian wrote. You can read the entire book at one sitting or glance through it if you have a few minutes to spare and still feel the impact of his writings , thus finding yourself highly amused by his insight. You can pick up the book again at a later time and enjoy it as much as before. The "authors"/collectors/writers of this book are to be applauded.

Funny and wise, July 5, 2005
Mark Twain was one of the funniest human beings that ever visited this planet. He was also a very decent one . He was skeptically wise and had the ability to a sentence or two put the most pretentious of all creatures , the human one, in its place.
This is the man who upon the premature publication of an obituary about him, replied " The reports of my death are greatly exaggerated".
One special reason I have a particular love for his work, is the fact that he of all the great writers, showed the most sympathy and insight into the life and situation of the Jews.
He is one of the few writers who it seems to me never has to try to be funny, because he simply is.
This collection of some of his most famous quips and remarks is a real treat.

a recommended collection...., May 27, 2000
...of spicy quotations by the master of words and wit. Gives sources too. Very enjoyable reading.

Honesty: the best of all the lost arts, March 24, 2007
And so it goes, page after page. You'll find your favorites.

"Habit is habit, and not to be flung out of the window by any man, but coaxed downstairs a step at a time." Pudd'nhead Wilson 1894, ch 6.

There's how Mr. Ayres presents them from a variety of sources, Twain's books as well as speeches, his notebook and essays and a few from letters and some listed as attributed to him. I have a nice collection of books on my favorite subjects but this simple one, nothing fancy, is one I go back to time and again. I find myself quoting him in various contexts and glad that I know the quotes. the art of Mr. Ayres is to cull out the various quotes from so many sources. Twain said them, Ayres found them and put them together very sensibly by catagories such as Heroism, Music andd Right and Wrong. It's an A to Z compendium. You'll find plenty of lively, homespun quotes that often feel like the very heart of the American character. Can't go wrong with this book.

Always funny, May 17, 2009
This is a great little pick me up kind of gift to give someone who might need a smile. He was definitely witty and blunt!

GOOD book!, April 14, 2009
Mark Twain has a lot off beautiful and uplifting words of wisdom.
I recommend it to all.


Author: Bogdan Alexandru
Thoughts across Time
... Read more

Editorial Review

Reviews

Go Keith! Loved it!, April 29, 2009
Not only is the most comprehensive book of Keith quotes and his wit and wisdom, it's also funny. The Keith information is pretty comprehensive-- it's a novel concept of how to tell the Keith Richards story outside of a traditional biography. Plus- you have this format of a making-fun-of-self help books that actually has a lot of pretty good self-help advice. Living life the Keith Richards way, while a humorous concept, actually makes a lot of sense, because so much of what he has to say is surprisingly smart and wise-- and you get it why he survived this long. Especially liked the Keith timeline that put forth the full biography of Keith in a way not seen before. There's some not-often seen facts about his childhood (his first gig as a teen where he got stranded at a bus stop over night, his early job demonstrating refrigerators), the run-down of his fight with "Brenda" Jagger, and the timeline of his arrests, car-crashes, and Ron Wood-related disasters. A lot of these quotes will be familiar to the rock n roll fan, and some of them will be surprising and new. And- you get Keith's mum's recipe for Shepherd's Pie. An original concept, fun, and recommended-- especially for a Stones fan.

LOVE this book!, April 30, 2009
I love how this book pokes fun at self help books, but at the same time is the best self help book you'll ever need. It's funny, witty, and thought provoking. All the wisdom you ever need can come from Keith Richards. I have this book out on the kitchen table and read a few pages or a few lines every day. It offers me just the right amount of wisdom and advice when I need it. It is well written and full of facts, too. It is a must for any Stones fan, but even those who are remotely familiar with Keith and the Stones would appreciate it, too. Get this book, you'll love it!

The Book of Keef, May 7, 2009
Wow this girl did her research. If you're a die hard Keith Richards or Stones fan pick this up! Fun and interesting read...It's essentially a Keith Richards Bible :)

Keith Richards fans have found their Holy Grail!, May 20, 2009
Jessica West illuminates with a thoughtful, picaresque, thorough and thoroughly entertaining light the many aphorisms and applications of the "heroin-addled guitar player from the projects" who ended up as a "twenty-first century philosopher and urban street guru." One of my favorite sections is "Keith and Nietzsche" where the author finds the wisdom of celebrated philosophers mirrored in quotes from Keith -- "Life is not a problem to be solved but a reality to be experienced" (Kierkegaard) and "I like the expanding vision of life, of what goes on. I find it a fascinating story -- a great book." (Keith) -- Yes, a great book indeed!

Keithism!, May 6, 2009
This is a very loyal book to a very controversial figure and his personal philosophy: Keithism. The lifestyle of Keith Richards is self-destructive but at the same time powerfully preservative. This superb insight sheds light onto the dark depths of the human being, and how even in the muck and slime of humanity, beautiful things may shine. Just as the great Nazi philosopher Heidegger said that we must be held out into nothingness to comprehend our own meaning, Keith Richards says, "At our best, we master the art of going just over the edge of the abyss, then pulling back.". By the way, Richards once lived in a secret Gestapo hideaway. Mrs. West riffs with a vivid verve on a remarkable man and his unique personal philosophy. After all, the man who outlived his heroin addiction, outrageous lifestyle, and trepanned brain surgery might have a thing or two to say about that muddled thing we called life.

Recommended, May 2, 2009
On concept alone, this one gets high marks. The writing is great-- and the author goes into all sort of creative avenues in bringing the story and philosophy of Keith Richards to life. It's not meant to be a super-serious book, but fun and informative, and on that level it delivers. Good gift for mothers day, fathers day, and graduates! Very unique book. Haven't seen one like this before.

AH ! FINALLY, THE WISDOM OF KEITH! MS. WEST NAILS IT., May 5, 2009
A brilliant concept, very well written, astute and funny "self help" book - an ingenious way of telling Keith's story and philosophy through quotes, humor and smarts. Unique, extraordinarily entertaining, full of surprises - take it from Keith, follow his lead cause if he can survive... You so don't have to be a Rolling Stoner to relish and delight in this wonderful ride. Cheers to you Ms. West! Now excuse me while I get another helping of wisdom from a second visit. Did someone say? "need a gift" ... uh...for everyone you know!

It will change your life, April 30, 2009
Well, it won't really change your life, but it will give you some laughs and some nice insights. What a great idea, and it is well executed to boot.

Pre-review in anticipation, May 11, 2009
Oh, man, I actually see something I WANT for Father's Day! Can't wait to read the affirmations of a true survivor. The title alone is golden!

WOW!, June 5, 2009
Well done! Combo humor book, Keith bible, self-help, quotations book, reference, and music bio. Add it to your Wit and Wisdom books, alongside Abe Lincoln and Winston Churchill. There's that many quotes in it. For those who didn't know how wise and cool Keith is, this is the chance to find out. Good for fathers day! Good for graduates! I've already found myself letting some Keefisms run through my head when needed: There's always the future...Trouble..it's all showbiz... Now all I need is a skull ring. Looooovvve. ... Read more

Editorial Review

Snooki, Ronnie, Mike “The Situation,” JWoww, Pauly D, Sammi Sweetheart, Vinny, and Angelina captivated America with their big hair, fake tans, fist pumps, and high drama on MTV 's wildly popular show Jersey Shore. But they don't just walk the walk—they talk the talk. Relive their most outrageous and hilarious moments with these memorable words of “wisdom” on life, love, and looking good.

These are rules to live by—G.T.L., baby!

“My ultimate dream is to move to Jersey, find a nice, juiced, hot, tanned guy, and live my life.”

“I feel like this job is beneath me. I'm a bartender. I do, like, great things.”

“I have a bad habit of playing little emotional games with men. When they date me, it's cool in the beginning. We do our thing in the first month, and then I send them on a roller coaster ride to hell.”

“Let's go tanning. If we got a little time, maybe we'll go to the gym and then get ready for tonight. You need that color—a little touch-up on the paint job.”

Features an exclusive BONUS DVD — watch the most memorable moments from season one! ... Read more

Reviews

hahaha!!!, November 2, 2010
If your a fan of the show for its insight into Guido subculture, you'll find this informative. If your a fan of the show for its ridiculous nature and hilarity (as I am) its a great laugh!! ... Read more

Editorial Review

Sisters are wonderful, and sisters are terrible.Depending on the day, the mood, the weather, or the time of day, a sister can be a companion, an adversary, an enemy, or a soulmate.But no matter what, a sister is always a best friend, and the combination of animal photos and quotes in this delightful gift book celebrate the unique duality of sisterhood. ... Read more

Reviews

Great Book!, October 1, 2007
I loved this book and ordered one for each of my 3 sister's for Christmas. The pictures of the animals are so sweet, and funny too! This book will definitly bring a smile to anyone's face, and warm their heart :0)

Wonderful gift!, December 26, 2007
I bought this for both of my sisters. They each cried and laughed over the images and captions. This book truly demonstrates the bonds between sisters. I highly recommend this to anyone who loves their sister and wants a fantastic way to show it! Wonderful book!

"Just Sisters", September 15, 2008
This is a precious book for sisters. The photos and quotes are magnificant. I read it every day. And when my sister and I have a problem, we quote from the book. Bonnie Kuchler did a beautiful job. My favorite is actually from an unknown. "A sister is one who will pick you up when you are down. If she cannot pick you up she will lie down beside you and listen". I'm so glad I could comment on this most beautiful book. Thank you.

Great Gift Idea!, February 22, 2008
Really great photos and sentiments on every page. Funny to read & fun to give.

Great fun and inspiration, February 9, 2008
This beautiful, inspiring little book is a perfect gift for a sister or a sister-like friend!

Makes a great gift for your sister., November 10, 2008
I purchased this for my sister's birthday.
I had to read it first and loved the photos
with the attached sentiments. This makes
a good gift from sister to sister.

Great way to express your self!, October 13, 2008
I bought this book for my sister to let her know how much she is appreciated. Since she lives far from me, I am hoping it will serve as a reminder. I added my own special notes to the quotes to add some additional laughs and tears. The quotes serve any sister well and remind us where we came from.

Touched my heart, September 29, 2008
I bought this book for my sister who is going through some tough times and it conveyed my love and support for her in words and pictures that were endearing and heartfelt.

My sister loved it, August 31, 2008
I gave this to my big sister. It was a wonderful way of saying I love you. She was very pleased with it

Perfect Gift Idea, January 11, 2008
This is a cute little book. The pictures of the animals are precious and the sayings are inspiring. I need to purchase more for my other sisters ;0). ... Read more

Editorial Review

Reviews

Lincoln said:, February 5, 2004
Abraham Lincoln showed a talent for sensing the future in the course of economic policy way back in 1863. Lincoln said then: "The money power preys upon the nation in times of peace and conspires against it in times of adversity. It is more despotic than monarchy, more insolent than autocracy, more selfish than bureaucracy."

"I see in the near future a crisis approaching that unnerves me and causes me to tremble for the safety of my country. Corporations have been enthroned, an era of corruption in high places will follow, and the money power of the country will endeavor to prolong its reign by working upon the prejudices of the people until the wealth is aggregated in a few hands and the Republic is destroyed," Lincoln said.

Great Stories, June 1, 2006
Humes book has a lot to offer Lincoln fans: a great many stories and anecdotes that shed a light on the many-facted, unique, and charming personality of our sixteenth president. I sometimes feel that these little story books do a better job of capturing someone's spirit than some of the big, thick biographies. And, at this price (same as a paperback), you can't go wrong.

Richard Salva--author of Soul Journey from Lincoln to Lindbergh [UNABRIDGED]

Wonderful, November 20, 2003
Lincoln is one of our most loved Presidents and with good reason. He is almost always recognised for his morality and honesty. Too often his intellect is overlooked. Reading this work will definitly provide the reader with a good idea of just how bright he was.

I read this work straight through but it would also be a great "subway read". Each of the stories are short too the point and usually very funny.

A Nice Little Collection, November 24, 2007
Fans of Lincoln are likely to delight in this mixed bag of gems from the life of Honest Abe. The book moves from topical quotes, to more focused collections of anecdotes from Lincoln's life, to a collection of his best known speeches. In comparison to his quotes, the famous speeches may seem somewhat dry. After all, many Americans have read some of the speeches several times since grade school.

The book helps to put the Lincoln character in perspective. As a man, he started some place and the stories of his life did not always exist. These things actually happened. Few people realize what a witty man Abraham Lincoln was. This book is a testament to that fact.

Lincoln, November 25, 2008
Only knowing what little they teach you in grade school about this man, i bought this book to learn a little more. This is a good book to do this. I found after reading this that i really like this great man. I would recommend this to anyone wanting to get a quick glimpse of Mr. Lincoln.
I hope this review is helpful to some.

'Pocket Lincoln', June 27, 2008
As a US History teacher, this small and inexpensive book brings personality and life to one of our most beloved Presidents. An excellent value and one that is more likely to be read and enjoyed than larger, more in depth works. Middle School kids get a kick out of the quotes.

Nice Work & Collection of Quotes, April 8, 2008
The book is divided nicely into categories and is a good book that doesn't need long periods of time for reading. You will enjoy many of the stories and quotations from Mr. Lincoln. A nice compilation.

Great Book!, January 13, 2008
This was a Xmas gift to a Abe Lincoln fan. She was absolutely thrilled. Highly Recommend. ... Read more

Editorial Review

Perhaps best known for his classic movie lines, such as Fill your hands, you sons-a-bitches from True Grit, the late actor John Wayne often displayed a spontaneous and biting wit away from the screen as well. This gem of inspiration contains Wayne anecdotes on God and country, the old West, friends and family, acting, and quotes from others about John Wayne the actor, and John Wayne the man. ... Read more

Reviews

John Wayne a True American Icon, December 12, 2007
This book has real American Ideals from a True American Icon, from a time when being a proud American was a good thing. This book has come out at a perfect time to remind Americans that it is okay to be patriotic.
This is something that any fan of John Wayne, westerns or American Ideals, should have on their shelves.
I highly appreciate Carol Mueller for reminding us that John Wayne was a True American and publishing it in time for John Waynes 100 year anniversery.

Father-in-law thrilled with it, January 7, 2008
The John Wayne fanatic in our family (who, by the way, has nearly everything John Wayne) was excited to receive this as a gift.

Gotta love the Duke, August 30, 2008
What else can be said about John Wayne? The quotes in this book are wonderful. They really reflect the genuine hero that Wayne was. If you listen really hard while you enjoy these bits of his wisdom, you can almost hear the magical voice of The Duke. If you are a fan, you must have this book!

The Quotable john Wayne: The Grit and Wisdom of an American Icon, March 7, 2008
Great book full of common sense and insight into the man. Proof that when you look up American in the dictionary, it says 'see John Wayne'. Why didn't we ever make this man President?

A Fresh new look at John Wayne, March 4, 2008
I've been a fan of "Duke" for over 30 years and I've read a lot about him, and I can say that "The Quotable John Wayne - The Grit And Wisdom Of An American Icon" by Carol Lea Mueller is one of the finest. Not simply another boring biography like many other books, this book succinctly gets to the 'True Grit'...the spirit behind the legend of the man. Chock full of interesting anecdotes,memorable quotes and tasty tidbits regarding Duke's attitudes about God, America & family values, it's all here. Good job Ms. Mueller!

A "True" American, October 19, 2010
John Wayne was my "Hero" when I was growing up. And as you know, all kids needed heroes, at least they used to. The heroes of kids nowadays aren't worth a hill of beans. John Wayne was a hero to more than just kids. He was also a true American. He instilled the values and morals in me, that it took to join the military during one of the craziest wars this country ever seen. John Wayne will be missed. ... Read more

Editorial Review

A Practical Handbook of Pertinent Expressions, Striking Similes, Literary, Commercial, Conversational, and Oratorical Terms, for the Embellishment of Speech and Literature, and the Improvement of the Vocabulary of those Persons who Read, Write, and Speak English, formatted for Kindle with a linked table of contents. ... Read more

Editorial Review

Epigrams, aphorisms, and other bon mots gathered from the celebrated wit’s plays, essays, and conversation offer an entertaining selection of observations both comic and profound. Organized by category, the nearly 400 quotes range in subject from human nature, morals, and society to art, politics, history, and more. A superb compilation, ideal as both an introduction to Wilde and as a treat for devotees.
... Read more

Reviews

Thin small and funny, January 10, 2002
Everyone knows OW was a witty guy.

If you want to find witty things he said in one small book such that you can try to emulate his wit, this book is for you.

It's good for an hour's read where you will snicker, snort, and grin.

It's exactly what i expected and exactly what I got. Whee!

Unparalleled Wit & Wisdom, November 30, 2002
"I can resist everything except temptation."
"There is no sin except stupidity."
"It is only shallow people who do not judge by appearances."
"It is always with the best intentions that the worst work is done."

These laconic aphorisms are just the tip of the iceberg of Wilde's impressive, yet oftentimes eclectic and nihilistic, use of the English language. Dover gives us 60 pages of brilliant witticisms and axioms to use over and over again for a mere dollar. You can't go wrong. Also recommended - Dover's Shakespeare quotes book for a dollar. Enjoy.

Oscar Wilde is a Genius, March 26, 2000
This collection of Wilde's greatest quotes is an easy read, and wonderful to keep around the house. Wilde's wisdom is displayed throughout this edition, and is a must have for any Wilde fan.

Thin book, fat wits!, October 18, 2007
This sweet little book is full of Oscar Wilde's great little quips. I absolutely love it! I keep it next to my desk and pick it up for those sweet little chuckle breaks that we all must take to break up the dreary work day! Great little read! Promise!

Useful Resource, March 23, 2008
Oscar Wilde was one of the most brilliant men to ever live and his oeuvre definitely deserves a quote book of its own. I realize that he has several but I bought this one recently and on the cheap (I got mine used from a z shop). Here the great playwright's observations are subdivided into chapters concerning men, women, marriage, youth, sin, religion, journalism, wealth, England, America etc. It's a concise collection but contains nearly 60 pages of priceless insight. Wilde sums up a large amount of human nature almost effortlessly via the words of the characters found in his works. In fact, if you ever need a source regarding just about anything cultural he's a wonderful authority. It's too bad he did not live in our times as his irreverence would have been better appreciated and celebrated--at least by those of us who are not politically correct. Rest in Peace, hero.

Very intersting little book..., July 17, 2009
...not as much to it as I had thought and the cover of mine was not as shown here but..the book I ordered was used and probably an older Dover edition. BUT that doesnt matter. You get nothing but great quotes and thoughts here from one of the geniuses of literature.
Thin book. Not very much to read but nice to own and refer to. Memorable. ... Read more

Editorial Review

A mention of flatulence might conjure images of bratty high school boys or lowbrow comics. But one of the most eloquent - and least expected - commentators on the subject is Benjamin Franklin. The writings in Fart Proudly reveal the rogue who lived peaceably within the philosopher and statesman. Included are "The Letter to a Royal Academy"; "On Choosing a Mistress"; "Rules on Making Oneself Disagreeable"; and other jibes. Franklin's irrepressible wit found an outlet in perpetrating hoaxes, attacking marriage and other sacred cows, and skewering the English Parliament. Reminding us of the humorous, irreverent side of this American icon, these essays endure as both hilarious satire and a timely reminder of the importance of a free press. ... Read more

Editorial Review

Have you ever wanted to be an intellectual, without all that tedious work of getting an advanced college degree? Here?s your shortcut to the world of the well read. Just open this collection of 1,417 quotations from the mouths of the wildly famous to the painfully obscure, and voila!--instant erudition.

It doesn?t take much to sound as if you know what you?re talking about. Just toss off some time-tested wisdom from Henry James or Plotinus . . . or, if you?re feeling daring, a line or two of poetry from Byron. In no time at all you?ll be sipping a glass of Madeira, sampling imported Gouda, and bragging about your collection of first edition Vonneguts.

Just like an intellectual. ... Read more

Editorial Review

"It's déjà vu all over again"—only better. The Yogi Book, the New York Times bestseller, now has a fresh new design throughout, new photographs, a career timeline, and all-new appreciations by some of his greatest fans, including Billy Crystal. And it's timed to coincide with the 85th birthday of this American legend who's more beloved than ever.

As for the quotes, well, Yogi Berra's gift for saying the smartest things in the funniest, most memorable ways has made him a legend. Or, as The New Yorker put it, "Hardly anybody would quarrel that . . . Winston Churchill has been replaced by Yogi Berra as the favorite source of quotations." The Yogi Book brings all of his famous quotes together in one place—and even better, gives the story behind them. "It ain't over 'til it's over."—that’s Yogi's answer to a reporter when he was managing the Mets in July 1973, and they were nine games out of first place (not only quotable, but prophetic—they won the pennant). "Nobody goes there anymore, it's too crowded."—Yogi's comment to Stan Musial and Joe Garagiola about Ruggieri's Restaurant in St. Louis 1959. "It gets late early out there."—Yogi describing how shadows crept across Yankee Stadium's left field during late autumn afternoons.


... Read more

Reviews

Every Page is a laugh!!, September 15, 1999
I knew that Yogi was full of great sayings, and this book has them all! Not only does it tell you what Yogi said, but he explains the situation and the people involved. It's great reading, and there are insites on Yogi from his celebrity friends and family. You'll enjoy it!

I Know He Didn't Say All Those Things He Said, June 13, 2001
This book has a lot of Yogi's famous sayings and how they first originated. While I was too young to see Yogi play, I've always admired him. Not just because of his apparent intent to destroy the English language with all of his malaprops, but also because of his Hall of Fame baseball career and his overall intelligence. When I was young and first heard some of his now famous quotes, I used to derive hours of giggles from them. Now that I am much older and hopefully wiser, I realize that Yogi makes a tremendous amount of sense with his observations. Essentially he's saying things in a short sentence that most of us spend an hour saying.

For example, "When You Come To a Fork in the Road, Take it," he's saying if you have a great chance for something, go after it and don't look back. Or when he says "It Ain't Over Til It's Over," he's saying the game is never over until the final out or the clock runs out on you. Or "You Can Observe A Lot By Watching," he's telling his former Yankee players to pay attention to the game they're playing in! After having read this short but fascinating and at times hilarious book, I've gained a new respect for Yogi as one of the truly great minds and people major league baseball has ever been lucky enough to have. While his quotes may prompt English teachers to jump out windows, I hope we get to hear a lot more of them.

fun from a simpler era, April 19, 2001
You always hear yogiisms pop up like "you can observe a lot by watching" - they combine homespun wisdom, unique humor, and gramatical error. In this book, Yogi puts it all together in a wonderful excursion into his life and mind, and the result is very very fun and funny. He is really from a less cynical time, when it was easier to believe in heros and you could take things more at face value. I love this book and have perused it many times for a chuckle as well as a good quote to post around the office. Great gift book.

Short but funny with some ponderables, November 18, 2004
This small book contains many of Yogi Berra's humorous, and sometimes thought-provoking, statements. I added over 30 to my quotes collection. He explains how many originated and that he did not say some of the sayings attributed to him (p. 9: I really didn't say everything I said). Quite a few of them have been quoted so often as to have become part of our culture:

p. 30: It's d�ja vu all over again!
p. 95: You can learn a lot by watching.
p. 118: The future ain't what it used to be.

But some were new to me:

p. 64: It gets late early out here.
p. 73: Always go to other people's funerals, otherwise they won't go to yours.
p. 93: Never answer an anonymous letter.

Finally, Yogi's family contributed some of their own:

p. 125: Tim-I knew exactly where it was, I just couldn't find it.
p. 125: Betsy-Sometimes you have to get lost to find yourself.
p. 125: Mario-I've double checked it six times.

Classic Yogi, August 22, 2002
This book is a great, but short read. It has most of Yogi's famous quotes and some that are not so famous, like something he may have said to his wife. If you are a Yogi Berra fan from way back or you just like him because of his different way of putting things, this is a must have. I got it yesterday and I finished it in a half-hour or so. So like I said it is not a long read but very enjoyable and will make you chuckle.

Fun and Nicely Done, November 14, 2002
What I liked about The Yogi Book is that it was a book about the man, by the man and for the man. It is a very simple book with a promising concept that had great pictures and timeless memories. The cut and dry attitude answers and explains the questions about his famous quotes in a way that is most delightful. The lack of nonsense and filler made the experience much more enjoyable and, combined with the fact that it was actually Yogi talking, made everything feel much more authentic and pure.

The one factor that seems to be a downside of the book is that is a very quick read. I was able to finish it in one hasty sitting and, being about as cheap as the day is long, I saw no need to purchase the book. For those that are fans as frugal as myself, I would recommend not purchasing but definitely reading.

Don't get me wrong, sure I'm a cheap [expletive], but that doesn't take away from this great read. You will be smiling the entire time you are reading and will be pleased that you took the time to go through all the classic quotes and great memories. Short and sweet, there's nothing wrong with that.

Very Useful Quotations, December 20, 1999
While Yogi may not have intended it, some of his statements are absolute gems in a business setting. For example, "When you reach the fork in the road, take it" is very useful in explaining the importance of making decisions. I use Yogi quotes all the time in speeches on serious subjects and they work very well.

I've yearned for a book like this for years, and here it is., August 31, 1998
Even people who don't care for baseball love Yogi Berra and his way with words. For years I've hoped that someone would do a book like this one, and here it is at last. Not only does it collect and present the best comments of baseball's great philosopher -- it provides background and context for every Yogi-ism. Those who complain that the book has big type and lots of pictures just don't get the point. Sometimes there's a lot in a little book, and this is one of those books. Highly, and delightedly, recommended. -- Richard B. Bernstein, Adjunct Professor of Law, New York Law School

Fun and Nicely Done, November 14, 2002
What I liked about The Yogi Book is that it was a book about the man, by the man and for the man. It is a very simple book with a promising concept that had great pictures and timeless memories. The cut and dry attitude answers and explains the questions about his famous quotes in a way that is most delightful. The lack of nonsense and filler made the experience much more enjoyable and, combined with the fact that it was actually Yogi talking, made everything feel much more authentic and pure.

The one factor that seems to be a downside of the book is that is a very quick read. I was able to finish it in one hasty sitting and, being about as cheap as the day is long, I saw no need to purchase the book. For those that are fans as frugal as myself, I would recommend not purchasing but definitely reading.

Don't get me wrong, sure I'm a cheap [expletive], but that doesn't take away from this great read. You will be smiling the entire time you are reading and will be pleased that you took the time to go through all the classic quotes and great memories. Short and sweet, there's nothing wrong with that.

A great book that is is short, concise and not long :), August 24, 2005
This is a must have for Yogi Berra fans or just anybody who appreciates baseball in an older, more pure era. This book contains not only his most famous quotes, but many from his personal life at home as well. The book is short (30 minute read). It is definately well worth reading or at least scanning through. ... Read more

Editorial Review

The murals in restaurants are on a par with the food in museums.

America is an enormous frosted cupcake in the middle of millions of starving people.

Critics are like pigs at the pastry cart.

Describing something by relating it to another thing is the essence of metaphorical thought. It is one of the oldest activities of humankind—and one of the most impressive when done skillfully. Throughout history, many masters of metaphor have crafted observations that are so spectacular they have taken up a permanent residence in our minds.

In I Never Metaphor I Didn't Like, quotation maven Dr. Mardy Grothe fixes his attention on the three superstars of figurative language—analogies, metaphors, and similes. The result is an extraordinary compilation of nearly 2,000 feats of association that will entertain, educate, and occasionally inspire quotation lovers everywhere.

In this intellectual smorgasbord, the author of Oxymoronica and Viva la Repartee explains figurative language in a refreshingly down-to-earth way before taking readers on a tour of history's greatest word pictures. In chapters on wit, love, sex, stage and screen, insults, politics, sports, and more, you will find quotations from Aristotle and Maya Angelou to George Washington and Oprah Winfrey.

Reviews

Mardy's Done It Again, August 11, 2008
I never met a Mardy Grothe book I didn't like. And "I Never Metaphor I Didn't Like" is certainly no exception. In his Introduction, the author describes himself as "a serious quotation collector," and in this newest of his four books, containing nearly 2,000 analogies, metaphors and similes, he provides indisputable evidence of that fact. He has indeed delivered what he promises in the book's subtitle: "A Comprehensive Compilation of History's Greatest Analogies, Metaphors, and Similes."

However, "I Never Metaphor I Didn't Like" is far more than simply a collection of quotations. In his own highly readable, entertaining and informative style, the author tells often fascinating stories behind many of the entries.

I can't imagine any word lover not wanting this delightful volume in his or her library. But be advised! This is not a book to be devoured in one, two or even in a dozen readings. In what he calls his attempt "to compile some of history's greatest word paintings," Mardy Grothe has succeeded beautifully. To fully admire and appreciate these "paintings" will take time, but it will indeed be time very well spent.

another of Mardy Grothe's joyful romps with tropes, August 17, 2008
With "i never metaphor i didn't like" [sic] Dr. Mardy Grothe once again succeeds in deriving both amusement and plenty of food-for-thought from the nuances of figures of speech-this time from metaphor, simile, and analogy. This is another of his books worthy of multiple browsings for examples of linguistic wit, wisdom, pathos, and bathos thoughtfully arranged by subject. Dr. Grothe intersperses the quotations with background information, anecdotes, and reference linkages that enhance the reader's enjoyment and make the book more than just a list of quotations. I've thoroughly perused all of his figure-of-speech books, and I'm sure this one will wind up as well thumbed as his others on my shelf.

His introduction provides a quick brush-up on the characteristics of analogies, metaphors, and similes that is bright and readable without being tedious. And his index by author will be appreciated by anyone seeking specific who-said-whats that are scattered among various topics.

Mardy triumphs again in showing the feedback loop by which our language influences our thoughts and our thoughts influence our language.

A National Treasure!, August 11, 2008
Mardy Grothe is a national treasure and so are his books. I Never Metaphor I Didn't Like lives up to Mardy Grothe's platinum standard of wit, wisdom and insight.

It is absolutely amazing that one man has such a comprehensive collections of quotes. It is even more amazing that he has them well-organized into topics. However, the presentation of each quote, painted into a context and story is nothing short of sheer delight.

I am a big fan of Mardy, his books and his "Dr. Mardy's Quotes of the Week" e-newsletter (drmardy.com). If it seems that I might be overstating and exaggerating, then I welcome the reader to purchase a copy in a failed attempt to prove me wrong!

I love this and all of Dr. Mardy Grothe's clever books!, August 5, 2008
I love this one and ALL of Dr. Mardy Grothe's clever books!

His exhaustive research, his witty chapter introductions, and his delight in words and word play are all evident and a joy to read!

His other books include, "Never Let a Fool Kiss You, or a Kiss Fool You," "Oxymoronica," and "Viva la Repartee," and they are so much fun, you will chuckle as you read them. As a fellow fan of word play, I adore reading his books and I'm eagerly awaiting his next, entitled, "Ifferisms."

Sign up for his weekly newsletter for even more interesting literary information and a puzzler, which I love solving!

--Linnda Durre', Ph.D.
Author, psychotherapist, and columnist

I Never Metaphor I Didn't Like, August 19, 2008
What a terrific Book! I have been a fan of Dr Grothe for a long time and now I have such a great collection of his wisdom and humor. Recommended to anyone who is in speaking, teaching or who wants to be enlighted themselves! I am each of those and find it a great resource. You will too!

An ounce of Metaphor is worth a Pound of plodding Prose, August 21, 2008
There are certain kinds of books that are simply fun. They do not have any great thesis or argument. They offer the reader a selection of very varied fare and suggest sampling it.
So this collection of Metaphors, Similes, and Analogies. Some will make you smile, some will make you think again.Some you will have to squint a bit to puzzle out.
But it will all be enjoyment.
For me a book like this is of special value. As a writer I am always studying ( which does not mean- learning) how other writers did truly good things. This book is rich in examples. As Henny Youngman might have said " One man's metaphor is another man's corned-beef sandwich."

Speaking Metaphorically, "I Never Metaphor I Didn't Like" Is a Gem!, August 6, 2008

I have in my library Dr. Mardy Grothe's previous three books "Never Let a Fool Kiss You, or a Kiss Fool You," "Oxymoronica," and "Viva la Repartee."

After having read once even an extremely well-written novel, most of us do not feel like reading it again. On the other hand, I fairly frequently feel like rereading for a while one of the above three books by Dr. Grothe. It's because the material in them is highly informative and witty. The particular genre of these three books enables me to randomly open any page in one of them and read the material on that page and the next few pages or any other pages. The way human brain's memory part has evolved, after having read these books once, my subsequent readings of them are of course much quicker while the wit and information stored in these treasure chests bring me experience of intellectual joy anew.

Expecting his latest book "I Never Metaphor I Didn't Like" also to be equally informative and delightful, I enthusiastically purchased it. After reading it, the thought occurred to me: "I never met a book by Dr. Grothe I didn't like!"

Reading Dr. Grothe's books is like watching linguistic ballets.

I find that a brief description of the "Metaphor" book is already provided above under "Product Description" on this web page; so I won't repeat it here. I would like to just say the following in closing:

Do you recall the "Try it! You'll like it!" slogan in the TV commercial some years ago for Bayer Corporation's Alka-Seltzer tablets? Well, regarding Dr. Grothe's latest "Metaphor" book, I would like to say: "Buy it. You'll like it!"

C G Jambotkar, Ph.D.

Enjoyed reading and found myself re-reading chapters, September 8, 2008
Metaphorically speaking, It's a great book! It was fun to read and I found myself re-reading some chapters. I have to tell you though; it's been embarrassing to tell people what I was reading. In one large group, after I mentioned the title of the book, everyone became quiet and looked in my direction, finally someone asked; you never met a whore you didn��t like? So I found myself explaining the title and more careful enunciating the words. �

Editorial Review

ox-y-mor-on-i-ca (OK-se-mor-ON-uh-ca) noun, plural: Any variety of tantalizing, self-contradictory statements or observations that on the surface appear false or illogical, but at a deeper level are true, often profoundly true. See also oxymoron, paradox.

You won't find the word "oxymoronica" in any dictionary (at least not yet) because Dr. Mardy Grothe introduces it to readers in this delightful collection of 1,400 of the most provocative quotations of all time. From ancient thinkers like Confucius, Aristotle, and Saint Augustine to great writers like Shakespeare, Oscar Wilde, and G. B. Shaw to modern social observers like Woody Allen and Lily Tomlin, Oxymoronica celebrates the power and beauty of paradoxical thinking. All areas of human activity are explored, including love, sex and romance, politics, the arts, the literary life, and, of course, marriage and family life. The wise and witty observations in this book are as highly entertaining as they are intellectually nourishing and are sure to grab the attention of language lovers everywhere.

Reviews

The Wit and Wisdom of Incongruity, October 5, 2005

One of my best friends had an aunt (let's call her Ginny) who, like Yogi Berra, could bring a lively conversation to a screeching halt with one brief comment. Aunt Ginny really was unaware of this (shall we say) unique talent. She was not trying to be funny, clever, etc. On the contrary, she offered what she considered to be a serious comment and everyone knew what her intended meaning was. For example:

"Quicker than you can count Jack Robinson."
"Deader than a door knob."
"She was born on a silver platter."

My personal favorite:

"He's on a treadmill to Bolivia."

I am curious to know what Aunt Ginny would make of Grothe's book. (She died many years ago.) She would no doubt agree with many observations but perhaps not see the humor in any of them. Grothe has selected what he calls "oxymoronical" material from his vast collection of quotations. With regard to the term, his definition: "Oxymoronica, n.; A compilation of self-contradictory terms, phrases, or quotations; examples of oxymoronica appear illogical or nonsensical at first, but upon reflection, make a good deal of sense and are often profoundly true." As other reviewers have correctly noted, many of the quotations which Grothe has assembled are hilarious, others insightful, still others cynical. All of them qualify as "oxymoronica."

Among those forgotten or of which I was previously unaware, my personal favorites include:

"Meetings are indispensable when you don't want to do anything."
John Kenneth Galbraith

"Hatreds are the cinders of affection."
Sir Walter Raleigh

"I must follow the people. Am I not their leader?"
Benjamin Disraeli

"What you get free costs too much."
Jean Anouilh

"Good fiction is that which is real."
Ralph Ellison

"Nothing is funnier than unhappiness."
Samuel Beckett (in Endgame)

Selections are organized within fourteen chapters, each of which has a generic subject such as "Sex, Love & Romance," "Ancient Oxymoronica," and "The Literary Life." I presume to suggest that Grothe's anthology be skimmed occasionally rather than read cover-to-cover. In the Foreword, Richard Lederer offers these comments which serve as an appropriate conclusion to my review: "Paradox is a particularly powerful device to ensnare truth because it concisely illuminates the contradictions that are at the very heart of our lives. It engages our hearts and minds because, beyond its figurative employment, paradox has always been at the center of of the human experience." Or, to paraphrase Yogi Berra, if people don't want to appreciate oxymoronica, nobody's going to stop them.

Those who share my high regard for this book are urged to check out The Portable Curmudgeon and The Return of the Portable Curmudgeon, both edited by Jon Winokur; also John M. Shanahan's The Most Brilliant Thoughts of All Time (In Two Lines or Less) and Condensed Knowledge: A Deliciously Irreverent Guide to Feeling Smart Again, edited by Will Pearson.

Quotations to Make You Go "Hmmm?", November 8, 2004


I am sure if someone had told me before I read this book that it was an easy-to-read, entertaining, and informative combination of a simple quote book, many cultural and historical references, and a scholarly and literary analysis of paradoxes and oxymorons, I would not have bought it. Well, I sure am glad nobody told me exactly what the book was about because I not only bought it and read it, I thought it was an outstanding book.

"Oxymoronica," a new term introduced by Dr. Mardy Grothe and the title of this book, was defined inside the front cover as "any variety of tantalizing, self-contradictory statements or observations that on the surface appear false or illogical, but at a deeper level are true, often profoundly true."

In keeping with that definition, the book contained over 1,400 oxymoronic and paradoxical quotations from ancient times to today, organized into fourteen categories, most of which you would expect to find in any standard book of quotations (i.e. advice; insults; politics; sex, love, and romance; marriage, home, and family life). Complementing the wit and wisdom of the quotations was Grothe's historical and cultural research and his ability to present and put into a logical, often humorous, context the quotations so that I could reflect on and appreciate their profound meanings. You can open the book at random or read it sequentially and get the same pleasant experience both ways.

I had many profoundly personal moments of reflection on people and events in my life throughout the pages of this book:

"Real knowledge is to know the extent of one's own ignorance." Confucius

"You can't make anything idiot-proof because idiots are so ingenious." Ron Burns

"The child is father of the man." William Wordsworth

"When you add to the truth, you subtract from it." From the Talmud

"He had nothing to say and he said it." Ambrose Bierce, on a contemporary

"I learned an awful lot from him by doing the opposite." Howard Hawkes, on Cecil B. DeMille

"Most people when they come to you for advice come to have their own opinions strengthened, not corrected." Josh Billings

"Vision is the art of seeing things invisible." Jonathon Swift

"All animals are equal, but some animals are more equal than others." George Orwell, in "Animal Farm"

Absurdity is the spice of life, May 28, 2004
There's something about oxymorons that bring us up short even as we laugh over the sheer absurdity of it all. Even the name of this little book is an absurdity in itself: "Oxymoronica"?? Reading this volume helps us to stop and think about some of the gems and malapropisms that have enlivened the English language, both planned and unplanned. Here you'll find some of the more classic Berra-isms and the wit and wisdom of Shakespeare, Aristotle, and Confucius, just to name a few. The book is well organized into different areas of life such as politics, art, romance and sex (some of the more delicious examples of oxymoronica fall into this category), marriage and literature. The book makes you reminisce on some of the choicer oxymorons of your own experience; one of my favorites came from a lawyer friend of mine, who, hearing that an upcoming court hearing was being delayed because the judge-from-hell was ill, said "Gee, I hope it's nothing trivial." "Oxymoronica" is full of hilarious examples that match or top that one. Its wisdom should be absorbed slowly, savored bit by delicious bit. To use a classic oxymoron, it's a terribly funny book.

Depth Charges for the Mind, April 1, 2004
Word lovers find an immediate friend in Dr. Mardy Grothe, for in his latest book, Oxymoronica-Paradoxical Wit and Wisdom from History's Greatest Wordsmiths, he has labored long to prepare a banquet for their absolute delight. Psychologist and business consultant may be his profession - and a demanding profession it is - but Dr. Grothe always finds time for his chief passion, which is the love of language. In this book, he shares the fruits of many years of collecting quotations, concentrating on those of a peculiar type-the paradoxical and oxymoronic-comprehended in his newly coined term "oxymoronica."

This book is no quick read. When you discover a fine wine, do you gulp it down? Or do you prefer to savor it, to prolong the pleasure, knowing that even when at last you have finished, you can return for many more unhurried sessions. Such is the experience of reading this book. You may open it at random (if you are an unsystematic reader like me) and discover a treasure like this one from Groucho Marx: "The secret of life is honesty and fair dealing. If you can fake that, you've got it made." Then you might laugh, but more often than not you start thinking and finding out there was something true about the thought, something that almost escaped your attention until the paradoxical twist brought it out.

What also impresses you is the broad range of the quotations, historically and culturally, from Confucius to George Carlin, arranged in fourteen different categories encompassing many if not most areas of your experience. What you find here is a tour de force, leading at least this reader to a conclusion - which itself is a paradox - that you will better understand yourself and your experience through paradox. I will not try to convince the skeptic (I was a skeptic myself), except to say that I am so glad that I experienced (so much more than "read") this book. Try it! Just maybe a few depth charges in your mind will clear your head!

A Tool For Wordsmiths: Mini-Review of "Oxymoronica" by Dr. Mardy Grothe, May 31, 2006
I have always found words to be marvelous tools, weapons or playthings - depending on who is wielding them and in what tone of voice. I marvelous at those who have the talent to express time-tested ideas in new and entertaining ways. So, I was delighted to find this little gem, written by Dr. Mardy Grothe: Oxymoronica - Paradoxical Wit and Wisdom from History's Greatest Wordsmiths." This HarperCollins book will be added to my bookshelf of hand reference works.

According to Dr. Grothe's own definition, "oxymoronica" are: "Any variety of tantalizing, self-contradictory statements or observations that on the surface appear false or illogical, but at a deeper level are true, often profoundly true."

The author has been collecting memorable quotations for many years, and out of the tens of thousands in his collection, he chose two hundred pages worth that best represent the art of verbal paradox.

I could share quotations from every page that are worth passing on, but to keep this mini-review from become too "maxi," I will share only a few quotations culled from my favorite authors.

From Dickens - the immortal opening passage to A Tale of Two Cities:

"It was the best of times, it was the worst of times,
It was the age of wisdom, it was the age of foolishness,
It was the epoch of believe, it was the epoch of incredulity,
It was the season of Light, it was the season of Darkness,
It was the spring of hope, it was the spring of despair,
We had everything before us, we had nothing before us,
We were all going direct to Heaven,
We were all going direct the other way."
(Page 197)

From Dickens Bleak House:

"He is an honorable, obstinate, truthful, high-spirited, intensely prejudiced, perfectly reasonable man."
(Page 205)

From Dostoyevsky's Notes from the Underground:

"In despair there are the most intense enjoyments, especially when one is very acutely conscious of the hopelessness of one's position."

"Man is sometimes extraordinarily, passionately, in love with suffering."
(Page 200)

From Toni Morrison's The Bluest Eye:

"As in the case of many misanthropes, his disdain for people led him into a profession designed to serve them."
(Page 201)

From Anton Chekhov's The Cherry Orchard:

"When a lot of remedies are suggested for a disease, that means it can't be cured."
(Page 204)

Joseph Heller, in Catch-22, is a veritable fount of oxymoronic wit and wisdom:

"Even amongst men lacking all distinction he inevitably stood out as a man lacking more distinction than all the rest, and people who met him where always impressed by how unimpressive he was."

"The Texan turned out to be good-natured, generous and likeable. In three days, no one could stand him."

Heller - in Something Happened:

"When I grow up I want to be a little boy."
(Page 207)

From Aldous Huxley in Point Counter Point:

"Several excuses are always less convincing than one."
(Page 208)

Washington Irving in Bracebridge Hall:

"Whenever a man's friends begin to compliment him about looking young, he may be sure that they think he is growing old."
(Page 208)

Edgar Allan Poe in The Purloined Letter:

"The best place to hide anything is in plain view."
(Page 211)

George Bernard Shaw in Man and Superman:

"The most unbearable pain is produced by prolonging the keenest pleasure."

Another Shavian gem, from Heartbreak House:

"The surest way to ruin a man who doesn't know how to handle money is to give him some."
(Page 212)

Finally, Alexander Solzhenitsyn in The First Circle:

"You only have power over people as long as you don't take everything away form them. But when you've robbed a man of everything he's no longer in your power - he's free again."
(Page 212)

This is a book you can read in one sitting, and then will return to again and again for inspiration and delight.

In keeping with the spirit of the book, let me conclude: "This little volume is a quick snack that will feed you for a lifetime!"

Enjoy!

Al

I laughed so hard I was brought to tears, March 7, 2004
When we hear the word "oxymoron", we typically think of the simple and classic contradictory word-pairs like "military intelligence", "boneless ribs", and "jumbo shrimp". But as Dr. Mardy Grothe teaches and demonstrates to us, there is much more to the oxymoron than meets the eye.

An oxymoron, he explains, is paradox ("a truth standing on its head to attract attention") compacted into a single sentence or phrase. Dr. Grothe offers us a remarkably rich collection of self-contradictory statements which on the surface appear to be false or nonsensical, but which upon reflection appear to be true -- often, as he points out, "profoundly true".

"Oxymoronica" is a book that should not be read quickly, any more than a box of Belgian chocolates should be devoured in a single sitting. Each of the many hundreds of paradoxical gems bears multiple layers of meaning: I found myself inevitably smiling, shaking my head, or whispering a delighted "ahah" to myself as I allowed each one to sink in.

Well-documented and organized (there's even a section on Oxymoronic Insults), "Oxymoronica" is a rich collection, but it does not pretend to be exhaustive. In fact, the author has built a website and encouraged a community of collectors and wordsmiths to participate in a dymamic and growing collection in celebration of this form of word play.

Dr. Grothe's collection is, in a word, "extraordinary". Which is, come to think of it, itself a one-word oxymoron.

A Treasure-Trove of Double-Faceted Gems, August 27, 2004
Dr. Mardy Grothe, author of _Never Let a Fool Kiss You or a Kiss Fool You_, has written another gem -- _Oxymoronica: Paradoxical Wit and Wisdom from History's Greatest Wordsmiths_. The subtitle is perfectly apt: Wit and wisdom form the crux of an oxymoron, and Grothe's examples -- drawn from around the world -- span millennia.

As Grothe says in his introduction, "Many examples of oxymoronica appear illogical or self-contradictory on the surface. But at a deeper level, they usually make a great deal of sense and are often profoundly true."

A linguaphile extraordinaire, Grothe has been collecting quotations for nearly four decades. From his eight to ten thousand examples of oxymoronica, he has culled nearly 1500 for inclusion in the present volume. He has arranged them into fourteen chapters, each with a theme, such as romance, family, politics, the arts, and literature. One chapter is devoted to "ancient oxymoronica," another to "inadvertent oxymoronica." Grothe provides commentary through about the first half of each chapter, citing oxymora (the purists' plural) that illustrate his points. The last half of each chapter presents additional oxymora without commentary. Grothe advises readers not to read these too quickly but to take time to savor each one as if it were gourmet chocolate.

Here are a few of my favorites from _Oxymoronica_:

There is no exception to the rule that every rule has an exception. --James Thurber

Nothing fixes a thing so intensely in the memory as the wish to forget it. --Montaigne

Courage is almost a contradiction in terms. It means a strong desire to live taking the form of a readiness to die. --G. K. Chesterton

I'm the Hiroshima of love. --Sylvester Stallone

_Oxymoronica_ is a linguaphile's paradise. It will delight you again and again with its double-faceted gems. It is a celebration not only of people's wit and wisdom but also of the paradoxical nature of our world.

Tantalizingly True!, January 13, 2005
Dr. Grothe's "Oxymoronica" left me chuckling and amused on more than one occasion. Although this book is -- as another reviewer indicated -- a mere collection of quotes, the presentation and commentary provided by Dr. Grothe makes it so much more than a simple book of not-so-simple quotes. If you buy this book, be prepared to mark it up because you'll find yourself repeatedly reminding yourself, "I've got to remember that quote". A stellar read that should be enjoyed, savored, and referred to frequently!!

Entertaining, Useful and and a Pleasure to Read!, March 27, 2004
I loved this book! If you are interested in the clever and inadvertently clever use of language, you will enjoy Oxymoronica. The chapters are organized into general categories and I especially enjoyed the ones on Politics and Family Life. I think the book would be an excellent resource for attorneys, pastors, teachers and anyone interested in public speaking.

Please, don't write between the lines, December 16, 2007
This book contains many fine entries by people other than the author, "Dr." Mardy Grothe. Many of them are not `opposite' or `contradictory' enough to fit in, and are less interesting than the ones that do belong.

The problem with the book is the many comments by the author, which at their best are not necessary. His day job evidently involves some sort of counseling. Perhaps this line of work leads him to expect that people require explanations. For whatever reason, he provides his readers, or rather the readers of his selections, with plenty of explanations. He tells us what it is about contradictory statements that makes them contradictory, or whatever else we might need to understand these otherwise entertaining quotations. He even tells us why some of them are funny. Like most people who `explain' what it is about a joke that makes it funny, he's not very funny, and neither is the joke when he is finished with it. No doubt you have heard the term, "firm grasp on the obvious."

Do I dare provide a quote from this mischief? Well, ok. From the Introduction:

Oxymoronica?" [sic] you might be thinking, "What's that?" While you surely know what an oxymoron is, oxymoronica is probably a new word to you. You won't find it in any dictionary (at least not yet) because I came up with it only a few years ago. In coining oxymoronica, I was inspired by words you may know . . . I use the word oxymoronica to describe quotations that contain incompatible or incongruous elements. Many examples of oxymoronica appear illogical or self-contradictory on the surface. But at a deeper level, they usually make a great deal of sense and are often profoundly true.

By leaving out the marginally appropriate quotations and ALL of "Doctor" Grothe's comments, this book could be reduced to half its size, and be considerably improved. ... Read more

Editorial Review

Reviews

He had great wit and great courage and he helped save the free world, April 1, 2010
There are a number of collections of the Wit of Churchill. This one calls itself the definitive collection. It has twelve chapters: Thrusts and parries, Maxims and reflections, Stories and Jokes, Churchillisms, Great communicator, People, Britain,Empire and Commonwealth, Nations, War, Politics and Government, Education ,Arts and Science, Personal.It has a small appendix on 'Red Herrings'.
I eagerly bought this book in part because in the back of my mind are a number of remarkable quotations by Churchill, including those of the Great War Speeches. Those utterances were not simply 'remarks' but were world- shaping historical events. The hero Churchill who rallied the British at their darkest hour and made it into their finest hour is one of the great human heroes. One of his quotations here is in praise of Courage, the first of all virtues and no one in those dark days exemplified and inspired it more than him.
Nonetheless despite my great admiration for him and the power of his language at the most critical historical times I was somewhat disappointed in the tenor and quality of many of the quotations here. Perhaps even a great man must be allowed his trivia. But should it be gathered in the collection of his most notable utterances? Is it possible that his truly memorable and great utterances are not in the thousands or even the hundreds, but rather in the tens?
I too do not think isolating utterances and presenting them on a wide variety of problems, people and situations really helps us understand Churchill's view on a particular matter.
But enough crabbing.This book does contain many gems from one of mankind's greatest heroes. Here are a few gems from a book in which there are no doubt more than I have noticed.

"Courage is rightly esteemed the first of human qualities because, as has been said,it is the quality which guarantees all others."

"Death is the greatest gift God has made to us"

"Meeting jaw to jaw is better than war"

"It is always more easy to discover and proclaim general principles than to apply them."

"Fearthought is futile worrying over what cannot be averted or will probably never happen."

"But you ought to let the Jews have Jerusalem; it is they who made it famous."

"In war,Resolution. In defeat, Defiance. In victory,Magnaminity. In peace,Goodwill."

"All wisdom is not new wisdom."

"One always measures friendships by how they show up in bad weather."

"The power of man has grown in every sphere , except over himself." ... Read more

Editorial Review

"The best kind of reference book--one that amuses as it instructs. I fell for it hook, line, and sinker."
CLEVELAND PLAIN DEALERR
IN A NUTSHELL, here's a terrific A TO Z listing of the meanings and origins of over 2,000 common or particularly interesting cliches for everyone who delights in the pleasure of words. ... Read more

Reviews

You'll be filled to the brim with knowledge., June 17, 2004
This informative, well-researched and amusing reference explains the meaning, origin and subsequent usage of over 2000 cliches, sayings and expressions made familiar through their continued, and sometimes exaggerated, use. It's a wonderful resource for writers, researchers and editors, for trivia enthusiasts, and for people who just love words, language and slang.
Each entry in this comprehensive collection is presented in a paragraph-length format, and is written in a clear, concise and humorous style that invites browsing, but is also appropriate for easy consultations, for which an index of cross-references is also included. Here you'll find the well known "head over heels," "fit as a fiddle" and "right as rain" and also the not so common "eager for the fray" and "Simon pure."
Although not all the cliches ever used are contained in this volume, it is by far the most complete compilation of its kind available on the market today.
Overall, this book is a delightful trip of exploration and discovery into the treasury of our language's most colorful remarks.
--Reviewed by M. E. Volmar

The Dictionary of Clichés, February 12, 2000
I got this book years ago as a joke. My mother uses clichés all the time and I thought it would be funny to give her the book. However, I kept it because I found it so interesting. Now it is integral to the research I do for my website. This book is informative, and well put together. I say BUY THIS BOOK!

COMPLETELY COMPLETE!!!, October 5, 1999
This is, without a doubt, THE best book of clichés ever written! It has EVERY cliché you'll ever need to know and is rife with histories of each cliché to boot! This book is a bibliophile's paradise, an historian's haven, and a boon to ALL students and/or lovers of the English language. You COULD buy Feldman's books (e.g.- "Imponderables," "Why Do Clocks Run Clockwise?" "Do Penguins Have Knees?" etc., etc.) or the Funk books (e.g.- "Heavens to Betsy," "A Hog On Ice," etc., etc.) but I wouldn't recommend it. You'd have to buy ALL of those books to get all the clichés in THIS book. So, for your time and money considerations, I say: BUY THIS BOOK!

To be or not to be ... let's talk clichés., November 11, 2001
This little jewel "comes on like gangbusters." This simile is a cliché, the bane of good writing; while they are acceptable in dialogue, in prose these truisms transform good writing into mediocre text.

This particular cliché was coined during a 1940's radio program called "Gangbusters," which opened with gunfire and police sirens showing that the good guys were once more closing in on a gang of thugs. The term "Gangbusters" is a cliché in prose, but the scene is a backbone of action movies or TV scripts.

How does a writer or editor keep the story from becoming boring by the over usage of clichés? That is where this dictionary comes in. As an example, I will string a few of the clichés together in the following paragraph. It may give the appearance of originality, but it is as old as the 'grim reaper' (1711). The humor is in the excessive number of clichés, but reading a story put together with clichés quickly becomes boring. I will insert the date the phrase became popular.

'Tom, Dick, and Harry' (1604) were 'fit as a fiddle' (1616), though Wally was 'dead as a doornail' (1350). No one thought about Wally 'in the heat of the battle' (1588) because it was 'do or die' (1809) since they all knew they 'bit off more than they could chew' (1878). Wally was as 'hard as nails' (1837), and had the 'bird's eye view' (18th century) perched, as he was, 'out on a limb' (1897). They agreed that Wally should have seen 'that snake in the grass' (13th century) or 'smelled a rat' (1550) when Sam 'cast the first stone' (Bible reference) toward him. However, Wally always expected a 'square deal' (1633) because 'a friend in need is a friend indeed' (1275), and he had known Sam since 'time immemorial' (1189). Of course, 'money is the root of all evil' (Timothy 6:10) and Sam was 'rotten to the core' (1718), so it should not be a surprise that he was also 'a cold hearted' (1606) 'eager beaver' (18th century) who 'shot {Wally} to hell' (1706) 'in cold blood' (1608). Tom, Dick, and Harry could 'go along for the ride' (1960) or 'explore every avenue' (1890) so they could 'divide the spoils' (Isaiah 12:25). They were, after all, living in 'a den of thieves (Matthew 21:13), and Wally was up there 'on cloud nine' (1950).

The Dictionary of Clichés is a treasure for writers and editors, and an 'honest to goodness' (1900) delight for everyone else. I enjoyed the history associated with over 2,000 clichés. To me it is five stars.

Victoria Tarrani

Interesting Facts, February 23, 2001
If you ever wondered where cliches like naked as a jaybird or killing two birds with one stone came from, then you need to check out this book. James Rogers has compiled thousands of cliches and the easy to read and use dictionary is great. Anyone who does alot of writing or research, then this book should be on your shelf. Even if you don't, it is still an interesting and many times humorous read.

Not enough cliches, July 20, 2001
This book is fine as a joke gift - it has plenty of interesting and sometimes amusing attempts to describe the origins of many cliches. But because it devotes so much time to describing the origins, it misses most of the cliches out there. It doesn't deserve the title of 'dictionary'.

If you're a writer or do speeches or presentations PERFECT, July 31, 2006
Love the opening when it says not to beat around the bush or hedge the bet, this is a must-read for every Tom, Dick and Harry under the Sun-- by PEOPLE magazine. Origins of almost every phrase you've ever heard. It's the cat's meow. I'm a writer of books and articles and it is one of half dozen books I keep on the desk, not the shelves-- Great when you want to ROCK THE BOAT or are afraid to RISK LIFE AND LIMB -- fun for using when coming up with a title for an article or when you've got writer's block. Even if you're rolling in the money you need to roll with the punches and get the show on the road....gives the origin, derivation and a sentence as to how the phrase is used . Compact little book 370 pages packed with hundred-- maybe thousands of phrases...don't miss it.

Raining Cats and Dogs, January 8, 2000
The Dictionary of Cliches is a great book! It's one of the best cliche books I have ever read! Rags and Riches, where does this come from? You'll find the answer to this question and many more answers! Face the facts, this is a great book to read when it's raining cats and dogs!

Disappointing, October 13, 2002
The first cliche I looked up wasn't even in the book. I have now started making a list on the back cover of the cliches NOT in the book. What a waste of time and effort. If you're buying this book used, check the back cover!

I'm now shopping for a replacement.

Fairly inclusive of most phrases, February 25, 2009
I guess I expected more 'informative' information about the origin of such phrases rather than just how each phrase was typically used. I assumed we all would know what 'to heave a sign of relief' meant, but I was curious how it came about. His explanations are mainly research of the first time the phrase might have been recorded or used. All in all I was a bit disappointed but it's my fault. I should have purchased a book intending to give the origin of use not just a dictionary. But I do think it covers most cliches. ... Read more

Editorial Review

A collection of words of wisdom, wry witticisms, provocative opinions, and inspiring reflections-from Benjamin Franklin to Colin Powell, Abraham Lincoln to Mother Teresa, Margaret Mead to Garrison Keillor. From one of the most popular features of Reader's Digest magazine. ... Read more

Reviews

Very good indeed, June 26, 2000
I washt expecting this little book to be that good . I have bought other similar books in the past and i thought to try this one as well and i have not regret it . This book covers so many topics like relationships , self-help , nature of life , virtues etc . Let me give you some of my favorite quotes included in this book : -There's one thing worse than being alone:wishing you were . -Know yourself . Dont accept your dog's admiration as a conclusive evidence that you are wonderful .

-Often we change jobs , friends and spouses , instead of ourselves . -A man cant ride your back unless its bent. -We all live under the same sky but we dont have the same horizon .

Good money value . 5 star rating no doubt .

Scrappers Dream, June 13, 2000
If you need a book with amazing quotes to use in your scrapbooks this is the book for you. Tons of great quotes and they are even indexed so if you just want a quote on family or babies you can find them. Every time I bring this book to a crop the whole place wants to look up sayings. FABOO!

The Best of Reader's Digest, June 1, 2000
I have read and collected quotes for 21 years and I look forward each month to "Quotable Quotes" in Reader's Digest. This book is a GREAT collection form this monthly magazine. I like the compact size and hope Reader's Digest issues other editions.

Great survey of sayings from around the world, April 30, 2003
For some reason, I have always thought of Reader's Digest as "lite" on literary value; I picked up Reader's Digest's Quotable Quotes based only on strong recommendations from a friend. Otherwise, I would have passed it over in favor of a book on "heartwarming expressions" made specifically for scrapbookers, as that was my purpose for hunting up quotable material.

I didn't expect the range of authors quoted here to be as wide and as richly reperesentative as it is. There are contemporary writers, classic authors, ancient proverbs from all over the world, religious sayings, and truisms from historical figures and current celebrities (although very little from the Bible, which surprised me). The topics these quotes cover are also varied on aspects of life. Take a look at the table of contents:
Within Ourselves
People Together
Our Better Side
For Better or Worse
When We Act
The Art of Conversation
Civilization's Gift
The Nature of Life
The Natural World
The World of Nations
Despite being brief and, ahem, digestible, this book manages to touch upon ideas and beliefs examined from several angles, some of them droll and humorous. In any event, a deliberate reading of Quotable Quotes will provide food for thought and could spark quite a few conversations in your household. Come to think of it, this book of quotes is almost like a short course in world philosophy!

I'm glad that I went for a more general-purpose book of quotes now, as it will have myriad uses aside from being a great source for my scrapbook pages.
-Andrea, aka Merribelle.

Samples of Great Quotes and Insight. A Fantastic Compilation, April 20, 2004
This wonderful compilation from Reader's Digest was given to me as a gift, and the gift is the wisdom, insight, and inspiration that came from people from many lands, heritages, and walks of life. The quotes in this book cover the gamut of life. Here below are just a few of my favorites:

"You don't stop laughing because you grow old; you grow old because you stop laughing." - Michael Pritchard

"Everything that irritates us about others can lead us to an understanding of ourselves." - Carl G. Jung

"The very essence of leadership is that you have a vision. You can't blow an uncertain trumpet." - Theodore Hesburgh

"To err is human; to admit it is superhuman." - Doug Larson
"To exist is to change, to change is to mature, to mature is to go on creating oneself endlessly." - Henri Bergson

"The goal in marriage is not to think alike, but to think together." - Robert C. Dodds

This book makes a wonderful gift for anyone who needs quotes for any reason, or even to just soak up the wisdom within. Highly useful, and wise!
Enjoy! Barbara Rose, author of `If God Was Like Man'

Wonderful Collection of Quotes, November 11, 2004
In this small book - about 200 pages - you'll find few thousand quotes for just about any occasion - to spice up your writings, your speeches or simply to enjoy their wit and wisdom.

Here are some examples:

"While forbidden fruit is said to taste sweeter, it usually spoils faster." - Abitail Van Buren

"It is only with the heart that one can see rightly; what is essential is invisible to the eye." - Antoine de Saint-Exupery

"Nothing ever built arose to touch the skies unless some man dreamed that it should, some man believed that it could, and some man willed that it must." - Charles Kettering

"The human capacity to fight back will always astonish doctors and philosophers. It seems, indeed, that there are no circumstances so bad and no obstacles so big that man cannot conquer them." - Jean Tetreau

"It is one of the beautiful compensations in this life that no one can sincerely try to help another without helping himself."
- Charles Dudley Warner

"Serendipity is looking in a haystack for a needle and discovering a farmer's daughter" - Julius Comroe Jr.

This is the best of many such "quote books" i've read., September 10, 2004


I picked this book as one of a set of three.The first one I read was Power Quiz Book;see my review of July 14th, 2004,which was also excellent.Because of that book,I was hoping this one would be just as good.I wasn't disappointed;it too was excellent.
I have a small collection of books on sayings,one-liners,or whatever you choose to call them and this is one of the best ;especially for its size ,coverage and organization.
Just to wet your appetite here are a few of my favorites from this little tome.
"Integrity has no need for rules."
"The real secret of Patience is to find something to do in the
meantime."
"There are no menial jobs,just menial attitudes."
"Give me the benefit of your convictions,if you have any,but
keep your doubts to yourself for I have enough of my own."
"Every man has the right to be wrong in his opinions but no
man has the right to be wrong in his facts."
"Forever is a long time,but not as long as it was yesterday."
"Serendipity is looking in a haystack for a needle and
discovering the farmer's daughter."
And finally one for book lovers.
"Books are not made for furniture,but there is nothing else
that so beautifully furnishes a house."

Thought-Provoking Quotes for Every Occasion, November 5, 2007
This modest-sized book contains thousands of quotes. It is well indexed. The quotes vary from subjects as diverse as cats, religion, self-esteem, marriage, happiness, children, humor, the American Dream, finance, injustice, personal problems, politics, expert opinions, the natural world, and much more.

Three of my favorite quotes are: "Smooth seas do not make skillful sailors" (p. 166); "Freedom is the oxygen of the soul" (p. 189); and "No one ever paid the price of a book--only the price of printing it." (p. 138). The latter quote is a good one to apply to this book of quotes!

Short nuggets of wisdom with an occasional shot of humor, October 31, 2007
The best nuggets of wisdom are short and have an obvious point. Some add in the additional quality of being humorous and others historical relevance. All forms of such wisdom are regularly found in the "Quotable Quotes" feature of Reader's Digest. This book is a collection of those quotes organized according to topic. Some of the topics are:

*) If you can't make a mistake . . .
*) He who hesitates . . .
*) Be bold in what you stand for ...
*) Manners are the happy way . . .
*) The difference between a hero and a coward ...

And they are all leaders into significant messages. There are few books where random reading is always enjoyable, this is one of them.

Interesting Quote Book, December 31, 2009
As a fellow quote collector, I loved this book. The author did an excellent job at finding quotes from people you might never have heard of that have said some very profound things. Definitely take advantage of the "Search Inside" function on Amazon, you will get a good idea of the people who are quoted in the book. I found the number of little-known authors fascinating, and thoroughly enjoyed reading quotes that I have not seen in other books.

I hope you all enjoy this little book, it makes a fun coffee-table book. Enjoy! ... Read more

Editorial Review

This 17th edition, under Kaplan's splendid direction, contains over 20,000 quotations, representing 2,500 authors, 90 of whom are new to BARTLETT'S. Newcomers include Bill Clinton, Hillary Clinton, Tony Kushner, Tammy Wynette, Margaret Atwood, Mary Oliver, Maya Angelou, Frank O'Hara, Martin Amis, Kingsley Amis, Mother Teresa, Jacques Cousteau, Rudolph Giuliani, Alfred Hitchcock, L. M. Montgomery, Eric Ambler, Jerry Seinfeld, J. K. Rowling, Katharine Graham, and Emma Goldman. With quotations presented in chronological order, in the famous BARTLETT'S tradition, BARTLETT'S gives the reader a vast panorama of the world, from the ancient Egyptians to the latest movie, from the inspirational and the beautiful to the sardonic and the downright funny. ... Read more